I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. Philippians 4:11 (NIV)
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Here are four steps to develop contentment in your life.
1. Stop comparing yourself to others. When you compare your life with someone else's, the only place it can lead is toward discontentment. There will always be people who appear to be better off than you, but you don't know their real circumstances.
I recall counseling a husband many years ago, and he said he wished his wife could be more like so-and-so, and he named a woman in our congregation. What he didn't know is that the woman was a functioning alcoholic causing incredible heartache and stress for her family and for her husband.
That's why the Bible teaches it is unwise to compare (2 Corinthians 10:12).
2. Be grateful for who you are and what you have. Learning to be content requires that you stop any "when and then" thinking - "When I am ___________, then I'll be happy." (You fill in the blank.)
The reason we fall into this trap is that we may actually be content for a little while but it won't last. But, more than likely, someone else or something else will come along and drain the contentment from your life.
But listen, you are unique. God created you to be like nobody else, so why would you want to be anyone else. God is perfect, and you were his perfect choice to be you. Understanding that is a huge step toward being content with your life.
And then look at all the things God has given you. So often we allow what we don't have to so dominate our focus that we forget the many wonderful things we already have, not only material blessing, but far more important things, such as family and friends.
3. Give yourself to others. If you will begin giving yourself to others, sharing what things you do have, sharing your time and your talents, you will find yourself learning to be content. Helping others will give you an appreciation for what you have and who you are, but more importantly, you will find yourself growing content. Why? Because God designed us to serve and share with others, and until we do that, we will feel great discontent.
4. Focus on things with eternal value. The real secret to becoming content is to focus on the things that have eternal value. It may be a familiar teaching to you, but Jesus said we should store up our treasures in heaven, and not on earth "where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal" (Matthew 6:19-21 NIV).
Think about the things in your life: What will last forever? What will last at least for your lifetime? What will last a few short years, or months, or days? Based on eternal value, what things are most important in your life? Where - and with whom - should you put your most time and energy?
By re-organizing your life around eternal priorities, you'll find yourself growing in contentment as you live according to God's design and purpose.
